Life is filled with well meaning people. When you homeschool it seems that you get a lot of well-meaning advice. However, some of this advice is just not worth saying. Here are 10 things homeschool moms don’t want to hear. Are there any you would add? Leave me a comment and I might add yours to the post.
10 Things Homeschool Moms Don’t want to hear
“You should put them in school.”
Whenever a homeschool mom is overwhelmed, tired, or just sharing a struggle with you she is not crying out for you to tell her to put her child in school. Just skip that phrase completely. Instead say something like, “That must be hard,” or “How can I help?” You could also just offer her chocolate.
“Your child needs socialized.”
Please for the love of all that is Holy let this argument die. Socialization is not the point of school. Education is. As I type this my unsocialized homeschoolers are in the backyard with a bunch of kids from the neighborhood where they will stay until the sun goes down. Instead of your child needs to be socialized, ask what our week looks like. It may blow your mind to hear just how packed our social calendar can get.
“Aren’t you worried you will fail?”
Short answer, yes. Every mom has at least one point, if not millions, where they wonder if they are failing their child. Instead of asking if I am worried if I will fail, think of five ways you can encourage me this week. Sometimes I just need to hear that we all struggle and my kids will be just fine.
“What do you do all day?”
This one drives me bonkers! I am pretty sure the perception is that I plop my kids in front of educational shows so that I can eat bon bons and play on Facebook all day. Between educating the kids, cleaning the house, running twenty million errands, all the extra curve balls that get thrown in my day, I rarely stop. Let’s not even talk about when I blog or work for some of my VA clients. There is no instead for this one. Please understand that my plate is full too.
“When will they go to real school?”
Homeschooling is real school. They are still learning. They just aren’t in a traditional setting. My children may go to a traditional school next year or in college. Either way, their schooling right now is just as real as the schooling they would receive in a traditional setting.
“My kid will outscore yours on the SAT.”
Congratulations! I really hope your child does well. If the SAT is the only way you quantify your child I hope that works out for you. I am not in a competition with you. I am teaching the children I have. That means that your child may outscore mine on a test. They may not. That is not our focal point. My goal is to raise children who love to learn and have the skills to go into the school or career they choose.
“You are just homeschooling because you want to push your faith on your kids.”
My faith is important to me. However, it isn’t the only reason I homeschool. Do my children see my faith played out every day in my successes and failures? Yes. That being said, I actually don’t have bible class in my homeschool. I want my children to own their faith.
“You are homeschooling to shelter your children.”
I actually didn’t choose to homeschool as a big shield from the real world. I do think that avoiding exposure to certain experiences is a perk to homeschooling but it wasn’t my original motive to homeschool. I even say in my reasons not to homeschool that sheltering shouldn’t be the reason you homeschool.
“Must be nice…”
This isn’t a genuine exclamation of must be nice where someone looks at what your doing and thinks it’s nice. This is more a cryptic way of belittling you for your choice. It’s generally followed with one of the above but most commonly it’s followed with a big old “what do you do all day?” For the record it is nice. It’s so nice to spend time with my kids. It’s also stressful, exhausting, overwhelming, and I couldn’t picture myself anywhere else.
“Your husband must be rich.”
I have to say this is one of my least favorite. Because we homeschool people assume that my husband must be rich so that I can stay home. Three words for you, “Full Time Ministry.” Because he works for a ministry we are not rolling in the money. In fact, he often jokes that I can pinch a quarter out of a penny. Homeschooling is a priority for us so we choose to make sacrifices in other areas. I also work from home. Between running this blog, my deal group, and working for a few VA clients I have, I am able to help keep things moving. Not every homeschool family is rolling in money. They just made a choice and make the sacrifices that go with it.
What do you hate to hear? Leave me a comment. I’m sure I have heard it at least once.
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